As You Were
by invalid-reality
Summary: A little twist on season 8...something happens to Faith and she's no longer who she was. The PtB have greater plans for her as a Slayer and as a lover
1. Prologue

Author's Notes: I was inspired to write this from Ciara (serpi) during one of our random chats a few days back, inspired by Hazy (deversum) cos she always bombards me with ideas every day and inspired to post it after reading lizardmm's one shot 'Lonely, Together' :)

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"The things I fucking do for this girl," Faith muttered as she crept across the roof of the church, keeping her eyes peeled for the demons that were following her. "Check it out, Faith, she says. Alone? Oh you'll be fine, Faith, she says. Sends me right into a fucking trap. Well fuck you too, Buffy."

She ducked behind part of the roof and peered down at the ground. There were ten of them now and they speaking in language Faith couldn't understand other than the grunts of approval they all made before they scattered and spread out around the church. She groaned quietly as she pulled out her cell and hit the speed dial, hoping that anyone but Buffy would answer the phone.

"Yes?" Giles asked quietly, stifling a yawn.

"G, I'm in a mess."

"What now, Faith?"

"Well, your golden girl sent me to check out this church right and it led me into a fucking nest of demons and now I'm hiding on the roof."

"How many are there?"

"Ten," she replied quietly as she tried to count them, the darkness and now the sudden rainfall making it impossible for her to see clearly. "Maybe more."

Faith held her breath as she listened, trying to figure out where they were now. She took one step to the side and closed her eyes as she heard the sound of wood cracking underneath her. Before she could even move, she'd fallen through the roof and crashed into the church.

"Faith? Faith, are you alright?" Giles asked but she was dazed and clutching her cell to her chest, afraid to move. "Faith?"

"Fine, G. Just fell through the fucking roof. Shit, they had to have heard that. Any way you can get Red to mojo me the fuck outta here before they find me?"

She lay where she was for a moment, listening to Giles as he spoke with Willow. She took in her surroundings and even though the church was dark, a small light could be seen coming from under one of the doors in the back. She clicked off her phone as she stood up, feeling drawn to whatever was there waiting for her behind the door. She was walking head first into danger and she knew it, yet she went anyways. This was why Buffy had sent her in the first place. The church was harbouring some sort of mystical powers and with no other Slayer's readily at hand, Faith had been the one who was chosen to check things out.

She stopped every couple of steps, listening to the demons outside scrambling to find a way in. She chuckled at how stupid they really were and opened the door slowly. With a loud whoosh she found herself in a freefall and yet, she felt herself in no danger. It was comforting, relaxing and the same soft glow of light she'd seen shining under the door now surrounded her.

"What the fuck?" Faith groaned as she suddenly stopped falling and the light faded and she landed on her ass with a loud thud. "Where the hell..."

"Do not question your surroundings, Chosen One."

"Freaky," Faith chuckled as she turned around in what she suspected to be a cave and searched out the voice. "Is this some crazy ass dream or am I like, dead?"

"No, not dead. Changed. For the greater good you'll see."

"Changed?"

"The other Chosen One, she's about to embark on one of the greatest adventures of her life. It has been decided that your fate will be that of embarking on it with her, to lead her down the right path instead of astray."

"What the fuck you going on about?"

"Love."

"Don't do love," Faith muttered. "Got the wrong person for the job, whoever the hell you are."

"What I am is no concern to you."

"At least show your face so I know who the hell I'm talking to!"

"You will change, you will be someone else. You will lead her down the right path towards true love, Chosen One. You may not believe in love, you may not do love as you say, but you will because this is where your fate has led you."

Faith groaned as she felt her skin tighten and her stomach clench. She fell to the ground, coughing as the dust and dirt drifted up and into her mouth, her nose and her eyes. She shook as she felt herself being pulled apart, almost literally and when she stopped shaking, she opened her eyes and found herself lying on the floor in a storage room.

"Jesus," she muttered as she pulled herself up and looked around as she dialled Giles's number and held the phone to her ear and waited. "Such a fucking mind trip if I say so myself."

"Hello?"

"Giles, something really weird just happened."

"Who is this?"

"Faith, who else would it be?"

The only sound she heard after was the soft click of the phone. And then it hit her. Her voice was different, softer. She walked around the small storage room until she caught her reflection in the mirror that hung by the door.

"What the fuck..." Staring back at her wasn't her, but someone else. She blinked a couple of times then burst out laughing as she checked herself out in the mirror. "An Asian chick. Great."


	2. Chapter 1

Author's Notes: So I have to admit I'm twisting season 8 around so much it probably isn't canon (not even slightly really) to say the least. I just had to fix the Satsu thing cos that whole thing irks me *shudders* It should've been Faith and this is my way of making it just that :) Also, the chapters will be slightly shorter than what I normally write, just giving out a fair warning here and I didn't think it was too fair to post a short prologue without posting the first chapter as soon as I finished writing it

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Faith couldn't stop staring at her reflection in the mirror, but the sounds of the demons breaking in the church window's pulled her out of the trance she was in and she looked around the storage room, looking for a quick and easy exit. It was just her luck there was no quick and easy exit aside from the door she'd walked through, or fell through. She was still trying to figure it all out and being hung up on by Giles had really pissed her off.

With no time to worry about the little details of the change she'd gone through, she burst open the door and took off running. There was no way she was fighting the demons, not when she was horribly outnumbered and there was no way Giles was sending help when he didn't even recognize her over the phone. She was in this alone and she had to get back to the castle in one piece and try to explain to Giles what had happened.

The rain had let up a little and in the new body she wasn't so sure of every step she took. It felt the same yet different than her own and she couldn't help but remember back to the day she had done the body swap with Buffy. This didn't feel quite the same. Didn't work quite the same way either.

"This is all her fault," Faith muttered as she made her way back to the castle. "Last time I ever fucking do her a favour."

She groaned out angrily as she let herself in the back door and headed straight up to her room. It was late and she was glad there was nobody awake. She couldn't deal with the questions or any of it until she'd talked to Giles. She barely reached her door when she felt a pair of strong hands jerk her back and spin her around.

"Who are you?" Buffy asked, looking her up and down. "How did you get in here?"

"I, uh..." Faith smirked when she realized Buffy really had no idea it was really her. She could have fun with this, in more ways than one. "New Slayer."

"Name?"

Faith panicked. She probably should have thought about this ahead of time, then again she hadn't even thought about using this new disguise as an advantage.

"Oh forget about it," Buffy muttered as she grabbed onto her arm and pulled her towards the stairs. "You can deal with Giles, if you haven't already. And that room you were about to go in is already occupied."

"I must have gotten lost," Faith said softly, trying as hard as she could to keep the laughter from coming out.

"It's a big place. I even find myself getting lost, but you won't have to worry about that. Someone will always find you and point you in the right direction."

"Uh, thanks."

Faith stood outside Giles' office and watched as Buffy walked off without giving her a second look. She shrugged and knocked on the door, entering before Giles even answered her.

"Can I help you?"

"G, it's me."

"I do not know who this 'me' is," he replied tiredly as she approached the desk he sat behind.

"Giles, it's me, Faith."

"Ha ha, very funny. Joke is on me."

Faith sighed as she slammed her fists down on the cluttered desk. "I'm serious, Giles. Whatever the hell happened in that church did something to me and I want to know how the fuck I can get my own body back!"

He blinked several times before he burst out into laughter, shaking his head as he leaned back in his chair and stared up at her. Once the laughter had subsided, he took another long hard look at her. The only thing that was still her was the clothes she wore, clothes that were much too big and felt out of place.

"If you are in fact Faith..."

"What do you want me to tell you, G? I go to that church, looking for whatever mystical shit Buffy found out was there and I fall through the roof while I am on the phone with you looking for an easy way out. I go investigate this light in some room and I start fucking falling into what looked like a cave. Someone or something was speaking to me too, something about changing for the greater good. How the fuck is changing me into someone else is for the greater good!"

"What was said, do you remember?"

"All I remember was what I told you and then whoever brought me there and changed me into this," Faith said angrily as she gestured to her body. "They told me it's to help Buffy. How the hell this helps her doesn't make any fucking sense!"

"Calm down," Giles said softly as he slid his glasses off and blinked a couple of times. "I need you to remember everything that was said to you. I think that the Powers that Be are interfering with fate."

"Fate! They said something about fate and something about love too."

"I need you to calm down and remember exactly what they told you."

"Been kind of freaking out here since it happened, G. I think I'm gonna need a drink or ten to calm myself down."

"Definitely Faith," he mumbled under his breath as he stood up and reached for a book on the shelf behind him. "I've read recently of a prophecy I was not certain would happen. There was no date, no specific origins. I'm going to need a few minutes to sort this out. You know where the Scotch is."

Faith chuckled as she headed for the short bookcase on the far wall and pulled out the bottle of Scotch from its usual place behind the dictionary. "I never understood why you hide it behind the dictionary, G."

"I hide it there because nobody bothers with the dictionary."

"Except me when you all tend to use big words in your reports that I don't understand," she muttered as she popped the top off the bottle and looked around for a glass. "This a new bottle? Smells different than the last one."

"Yes, I believe it is," Giles replied without glancing up from the book open on the desk in front of him.

"Giles?" Willow asked as she opened the door and quickly closed it behind her. "Have you heard from Faith? Has she come back yet or do I need to go and...oh hello."

"Hey Red."

"Giles?"

"That is Faith," he muttered as he continued reading from the book, furiously flipping through each page until he found the right one.

"Nice joke, Giles."

"I believe it is not a joke," he said as he looked up at Willow. "That is indeed Faith."

"Doesn't look like her."

"Look a little harder, Red."

"Has the same attitude though," Willow laughed. "Wow, how did something like this happen?"

"Beats me," Faith shrugged as she gave up on finding a glass and took a swig from the bottle when Giles wasn't looking. "I go looking for some mystical energy or whatever the fuck Buffy sent me looking for, stumble upon a nasty nest of demons just outside of the church and well...keeping things short here; I walked outta there looking like this."

"Have you decided on a name?" Giles asked before Willow had a chance to say anything more. "Because unfortunately for you, it looks like this is the prophecy I had mentioned earlier. It won't come undone until you have done what you are needed for. There are no specifics, but it does mention..."

"Mention what?" Willow asked as she walked over and took a look at the page he was reading.

"Love," Giles chuckled as he closed the book. "Hardly a prophecy to worry ourselves over, to say the least."

"Love?" Faith asked, shocked despite the fact she'd already been told this by the Powers that Be. "Don't you think I should have been changed into a guy? Cos hello, Buffy isn't into chicks!"

"As I said before, have you decided on a name, Faith? Because according to the prophecy nobody should know about this change aside from yourself and now that Willow and I both know..."

"What he's trying to say," Willow chuckled as she shook her head. "You need to come up with something to call your new self. We can't exactly go around calling you Faith until you change back."

"I'm drawing blanks here. You two are supposed to be the brains here, not me!"

"Well, you look like you could be Japanese," Willow mused as she studied Faith, unable to wipe the smirk off of her face. "What do you think, Giles?"

"Satsu!" Faith burst out, saying the first thing that came to her mind. "What?"

"Could work," Willow said with a shrug. "Kind of just rolls off your tongue."

Faith took another swig of the Scotch and put it back on the shelf as Giles and Willow started laughing. "What the hell is so funny? Cos I am not fucking finding this funny!"

"Rolls off your tongue," Willow laughed as she held her sides. "Oh god, this is too much. This is like finding out my best friend is gay before she even knows she is. Actually, that is exactly what this is!"

"Wait, what?!"

"Giles, do you care to explain or shall I?"

"Feel free. I do not feel rather comfortable talking about this."

"But you're laughing about it!" Faith pointed out. "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

"It seems that the Powers that Be have connected you two, but because of your past and the fact you cannot see past it, you have to win her love by being masked as someone else."

Faith blinked. Giles coughed. Willow just stared straight at her.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"Nope. This is a true love, fate, destiny, soul-mate thing."

"And me being someone else is gonna make Buffy realize she's in love with me how exactly?"

"That's the mystery about it all, we don't know and I do not believe we will until the prophecy has been fulfilled," Giles replied as he picked up the book and placed it back on the shelf. "Now, we'll discuss this again in the morning. It is late and I know for a fact that you have not slept in three days, Faith."

"Don't you mean 'Satsu'?" Willow snickered as she shook her head. "I'm sorry, but it's funny!"

"Whatever. Where am I gonna sleep? Buffy kind of stopped me from going into my room and made me come down here."

"You will sleep in the spare guest room down the hall. It isn't what you are used to and unfortunately, that's the only room available. I'll see what I can do about you getting back into your own room seeing how Faith is 'mysteriously' out of action at the moment."

"Whatever, G. I've slept in worse."

Faith left the two of them and headed for the spare room only ever used for the odd visitor. Not like they ever had any visitors. The castle was strictly off limits to outsiders. If you weren't a Slayer, a witch, Dawn or a member of the newly reformed Council, you never made it past the front doors. It had never stopped Faith before from bringing home the occasional one-night stand she'd pick up in a pub in town. She'd gotten caught once or twice by Buffy, but nothing was ever said between the two other than Buffy telling her she better not get caught by anyone else. She was thankful she reached the guest room without having run into Buffy or anyone else. She'd been through enough as it was and she needed some serious downtime to sleep and to think about what the hell she was going to do to get this prophecy over and done with so she could go back to being herself.

The whole situation didn't make any sense to her and she kept the lights off and headed for the small bed and laid down. What the hell did she have to do with leading Buffy onto the right path to true love? She scoffed as she closed her eyes, fighting off the sleep she'd longed so desperately to come for the past couple of days. Buffy had her running around constantly, going out on solo patrols or training the newer girls and she hadn't had the chance to sit down and unwind just yet. She didn't love Buffy. She knew the Powers that Be surely had her mixed up with someone else, possibly with another Slayer. She convinced herself before she started to feel the gentle pull of sleep that it was just a big misunderstanding and that Giles and Willow would have it all sorted out in the morning.

Her dreams never came, instead she found herself encased in never-ending darkness until the first rays of the new morning sunlight shone through the small windows. Feeling as if she hadn't slept at all, she got up from the bed and looked down at her clothes. She needed clothes that were going to fit her if she was going to deal with this whole situation. She waited there in the room until she'd heard everyone head down the stairs for the morning training sessions before she went through each of the younger Slayers' rooms until she found clothes that fit her. She made a quick stop in her room, grabbing her smokes, her favourite knife and she stopped to look at herself in the mirror and really took a long hard minute to check her 'new' self out.

"Not bad," she said under her breath as she examined the soft features of her face. "Could be better, could be worse. Then again I could be myself. Guess now is the wrong time to be too picky about it."

Faith shrugged and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her and quickly made her way to the stairs. A couple of the younger Slayers ran past her, laughing over the fact they were late for training. Faith couldn't hold back her smirk as she ditched the stuff in the guest room before she followed them down to the training room. She had to blend in. Her instincts were telling her to take the ball and roll with it and try to make the best out of the situation. She was a Slayer, a damn good one at that and she never came across a situation she couldn't handle.

Buffy looked over at her as soon as she'd joined the group in the middle of the training room. She instructed the girls to being warming up and she walked right up to Faith with a smile upon her face.

"Did you make out okay last night?"

"I did. Giles was a big help."

"Good, I'm glad. What is your name by the way?"

"Satsu. I was a little...nervous meeting you last night like that. I didn't expect to meet you right away."

"Understandable," Buffy laughed as she held out her hand. "Nice to meet you. Any questions about the training schedule or anything else you can always come and ask me. My door is always open."

Faith chuckled and nodded as she pulled her hand away and stood there and watched as Buffy looked at her for a split second longer than she'd ever looked at her before she walked away. She couldn't help but think about what she knew so far of this supposed prophecy. She was supposed to lead Buffy down the right path of true love and she was going to be doing it trapped in a body of a random girl who definitely had nothing against the real her.

She slipped out of the training room, knowing she had to talk with Willow and Giles before she got too comfortable playing in her new role as Satsu. She found them in Giles office, as expected, looking over dozens of books and exchanging notes.

"What's the what?" Faith asked as she closed the door and took a seat on the comfortable red leather couch near the window. "Figure out how to fix this? Change me back?"

"You have to complete the prophecy. It is the only way."

"So what, I gotta like, fuck Buffy senseless and poof, I'll be me again? Say the word. I'll have this done before the day is over."

Giles' face went red as Willow stifled back her laughter. Faith rolled her eyes as she leaned back on the couch and waited for what she knew was a rather awkward situation for both of them.

"I'm thinking there'll be some of that involved," Willow said softly and she shook her head as she tried to stop laughing. "But no, Faith. You have to get her to realize that she loves you and despite it not being you, this is what it's going to take. She has to be with another before she can see what's really there in front of her own eyes."

"What the hell kind of prophecy is this if all it's doing is making Buffy realize she's gay and wanting to get with the girly loving? This makes no fucking sense! Giles..."

"Not all prophecy's are about death and the end of the world," Giles said pointedly. "But it is the simplest ones that prove to be far more complex. As for the reason of this prophecy, we have been researching and so far have come up with nothing."

"Great. You realize how pathetic this whole situation is?" Faith huffed out as she closed her eyes. "Why does the weird shit happen to me? It never used to happen to me! This whole god damn place is cursed!"

The three of them let out a sigh as silence filled the room. Faith knew she was in a situation she had no control over and no matter how good of a Slayer she was, nothing could prepare her for what she was about to dive into. She knew now she had absolutely no choice whether she liked it or not.


	3. Chapter 2

Faith sat on the windowsill, looking out over the darkness as she smoked her fourth consecutive cigarette of the night. She still wasn't so sure what to make of everything she'd found out about the so-called prophecy. She was destined to be Buffy's true love and to awaken the awareness of it to Buffy she had to be someone else.

"What a crock of shit," she muttered as she stubbed out the cigarette and lit another.

Giles and Willow again and again had gone over the details and although there wasn't much to go by, they were iron-clad. She had to do this. She had to pull it off. She was fooling herself when she believed she'd be strong enough to do it too. She didn't do love and she sure as hell did not love Buffy. She couldn't love Buffy, her once enemy who had tried to kill her. Granted, she was the one who tried to kill Angel, but that was in the past and they'd gotten over it. Hadn't they?

Not even when they relocated to Scotland after the fall of Sunnydale had her and Buffy been on what she'd call friendly terms. They worked together, occasionally slayed together, but outside of that, all they had was a working relationship. She didn't even look at Buffy in 'that' way. She never had. Did she?

"Who am I kidding?" Faith laughed at herself as she watched the smoke curl out the open window and out into the darkness. "I've always had a thing for her. She's fucking Buffy Summers. Everyone has a fucking thing for her whether they want to or not."

Trying to clear her head, she began pacing in front of the window, listening to the quiet of the night and the hushed whispers floating through the castle. She'd been a big topic of discussion. Among most of the younger Slayers, she was the one who just popped up out of nowhere and arrived in the middle of the night. It had been almost fourteen months since a new Slayer had come to the castle so she couldn't blame everyone for wanting to gossip about her. It was no different than when she was herself either. One way or another she always overheard her name in the hushed whispers and her name was always attached to Buffy's.

The soft knock on her door made her flick the cigarette out the window and she inhaled deeply as she walked over to the door and unlocked it.

"I was hoping you'd still be awake," Willow said quietly as she took it upon herself that Faith opening the door was a gesture for her to come in. "I was reading over the prophecy again since I couldn't sleep and I found some information I thought you'd want to know."

"Red," Faith groaned as she closed the door and rubbed her throbbing temples. "This can't wait until the morning?"

"No. There's a timeline, Faith. You have two weeks starting from last night to make this happen. Two weeks!"

"I can have it done in two hours."

"Has she even said more than two words to you at all today?"

"Kind of been avoiding her with the research with you and G and all. Is that all you wanted to tell me? That I got two weeks to make this happen?"

"She asked me about you tonight," Willow said softly as she looked around the room, avoiding Faith's eyes. "She's actually worried about you since you didn't come back last night. I covered for you. I panicked, but I covered for you. I told her you went to Cleveland to help Robin out with a few of the Slayers staying there with him."

"And she believed you?"

"I hope so. We really need to come up with a solid, believable plan to get through the next two weeks, Faith. I know you don't like this and you think I do? What the hell kind of prophecy is this?"

"I'm starting to think it's some kind of a joke the Powers that Be are playing on us," Faith shrugged. "What's the point of it anyway? She finds out how she really feels about me and then what? It's not like I'm gonna go and be her fucking girlfriend! I don't do relationships!"

"Faith, don't freak out," Willow said softly as she stood up and walked over to her. "There was something in the prophecy Giles and I failed to mention earlier and I'm thinking right now is the perfect time for me to tell you. Just promise me you won't start freaking out."

"Sure, fine. Tell me."

"There have never been two Slayers in existence at the same time and there's never been hundreds of thousands either. But this prophecy was written when you were first called. The details are hazy, but you are her other half. It kind of makes complete sense why it has to happen now."

"Wait a sec, Red. I'm her other half? How does that make any sense? We're nothing alike and we never will be."

"You complete each other because of your differences. If it wasn't all so messed up and not to mention weird, I'd think it's kind of sweet and romantic."

"Right," Faith laughed as she rolled her eyes and tried to keep herself from laughing uncontrollably. "And why now?"

"Because you are both lonely and lost and it's affecting your life, slaying, everything."

Faith sighed as she walked over to the bed and sat down. "You know, I never thought I'd find out I was in love with her like this. Thought it'd be after some drunken one night stand or some shit, you know? Didn't think I'd have to turn into someone else for her to realize it either."

"Nothing ever makes sense in our lives. I guess it comes with the job description," Willow said with a smile as if she was trying to reassure her that no matter how twisted things were, it was 'normal', at least to them. "Wait, did you just say you are in love with her?"

"That's what I said."

It took Willow more than five minutes to register what Faith had said to her and by the time she stopped opening and closing her mouth like a gaping fish struggling to breathe, Faith was standing back at the window and smoking yet another cigarette. Faith could hardly believe her revelation either, but it was obvious. Very obvious. She'd expected to feel weird saying it out loud. Hell, she didn't even expect to ever hear those words come out of her mouth and technically, they weren't. They were her words, her thoughts, but not her voice. It sounded a little too surreal and surprisingly not that awkward.

"Wow."

"Yeah, big wow," Faith chuckled as she waved her hand in front of a dazed Willow. "It's really shocking, isn't it?"

"Coming from you, definitely."

"So how am I gonna do this, Red? My usual strategy won't work on her."

Willow smirked as she sat next to her on the bed. "I have a couple of ideas. Buffy is...you need to approach her a certain way. Being straightforward isn't going to work on her and seeing how she's never been with another woman before this is going to have to be planned out to the very last finest detail."

"You seem a little too eager to help me," Faith said slowly as she stared at her. "Kind of creepy considering we aren't exactly what you'd call friends."

"It's easier to see you like this than your actual self, as crazy as it is. The attitude is still there, but you being in this body, it's different somehow."

"Easier to see past the past or something, right?"

"Something like that."

"So, you said you had a plan? Well, hit me with it, Red. Time's a ticking away here. Sooner I can get this prophecy fulfilled the sooner I can go back to being me and I can't fucking stress how much I miss being me."

"Here's the plan, at least the one that'll get the ball rolling..."

****

Faith didn't like it. She felt uneasy. Something felt entirely wrong about the whole plan Willow had come up with. Even though Willow had promised her the spell she was going to cast on Buffy would be perfectly harmless and would not interfere with the prophecy, she still had a bad feeling about it. It was going to happen by the morning. Willow told her the less she knew about what she was planning to do the better and more believable it'd be to Buffy and everyone else.

She couldn't sleep. As tired as she was, she couldn't stop her mind from racing. Alcohol didn't help either. It made it worse. She worried if anyone else saw the way she was reacting and saw the little habits she had, they'd start to become suspicious. Giles and Willow had warned her she couldn't let that happen and she was fully thinking of locking herself in the guest room and hoping to hell that somehow the prophecy would become fulfilled one way or another.

It wasn't going to be that easy and the commotion in the hallway pulled her away from her thoughts. It was happening. Earlier than Willow had told her, but it was happening. She opened the door and followed the dozens of girls already heading towards Buffy's suite. Among the commotion, Faith was able to make her way into the main room in front of all the other girls while Willow tried to calm them all down.

Buffy laid on the bed, seemingly asleep and looking restless and yet peaceful. She didn't listen to a word Willow said as she tried to tell the others what she knew had happened. She took that moment to really look at Buffy. She was unguarded and without the looks of disapproval she always gave Faith whenever she looked back at her. She snapped out of the trance she'd fallen into when she noticed Willow trying to quietly get her attention. That's when she noticed everyone else had their eyes closed and Willow was motioning for her to step forward.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, she leaned down and lightly kissed Buffy. Even with Buffy asleep and her being in another body, she felt the jolt of electricity shoot through her body. It wasn't like she imagined it to be, then again, before this whole situation had evolved, she'd never even imagined kissing Buffy. As she pulled away slowly, she ran the tips of her fingers over Buffy's jaw, marvelling how soft her skin felt against her own even if it wasn't her own skin. Yet.

"This gonna work?"

"Yes," Willow nodded. "It should."

Her lips were tingling as she stepped back from the bed. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol she'd been drinking or if it was in fact the tender, light kiss she'd just given Buffy. Nobody else around them had yet to open their eyes and if they'd heard her and Willow speak to each other, they didn't make it known.

"Is it done yet?" Kennedy asked, clearly annoyed as she opened her eyes and looked over at Faith then at Willow. "So who did it?"

"What?" Faith asked, laughing as she stepped further away from the bed before the others began to open their eyes. "It's done when she wakes up, isn't it, Willow?"

"What the hell kind of a spell is this anyway?" Kennedy laughed as she hung back while the others left, as confused as they were when they first came in there. "Don't you dare lie to me either, Will. I know you've been lying to me about where Faith is too."

Faith stepped back, watching the two of them as everyone else left the room, muttering their goodnights. Only Xander stayed and he stood next to Faith and looked down at her. He smiled a little and she smiled back, almost forgetting just who she was in that moment. She was supposed to be 'Satsu' and she had to stick with the plan or she'd most likely be stuck this way for god knows how long. Possibly forever.

She looked back over at Buffy, ignoring Willow and Kennedy as they argued quietly by the doorway. She tried not to smile as she saw Buffy's eyes flutter a little before they slowly opened. Xander was too busy looking at her and Willow and Kennedy were too busy arguing to notice that Buffy had woken up and she was gently touching her lips. She looked over at Faith and again, she forgot who she was when she saw the small smile curl over Buffy's lips.

"What happened? I just had the weirdest dream."

"It was a spell B...Buffy," Faith stuttered, catching the slip up as quickly as she could. "Everything is fine now. It's over."

"How are you feeling?" Xander asked, giving Faith a quick glance as he moved to the side of the bed.

"I don't know...tingly," Buffy laughed quietly. "What happened and why can I taste...cinnamon buns and whiskey?"

"Like Satsu said, there was a spell. Willow found you and she figured out how to break it."

"Oh."

Faith slowly backed up towards the door, feeling out of place and slightly uncomfortable. She slipped out of the room and stood in the hallway and listened as Willow tried to explain to Buffy what happened without giving too much away. From the sounds of it, Buffy was taking it rather well. She wasn't angry or upset she'd been put under a mysterious spell and she was questioning the reasons why. Faith nearly took off running when Kennedy walked out and look at her, smirking as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"It was you, wasn't it? You broke the spell."

"No..."

"You just get here what, yesterday, and you are already in love with Buffy? Now why doesn't that surprise me?"

Faith shrugged, not finding an easy way out of this conversation. Even though she never took the time to get to know Kennedy, she knew how confrontational she could be.

"There's something about you, something I can't put my finger on. Whatever it is, I'm telling you right now that I do not trust you."

"That's fine," Faith replied through gritted teeth. "You don't even know me. I wouldn't expect you to trust me."

"I know something weird is going on. Willow has been acting strange since you arrived. Come to think of it, everyone has been. Who are you really or should I be asking, what are you?"

Faith hadn't been prepared for a confrontation with Kennedy or anyone else. She wasn't prepared for any of this and luckily for her, Willow came out of the room before she or Kennedy could say a word. They walked off, their argument from before continuing and fading away the further they got. She looked back into the room, watching Buffy as she and Xander talked and laughed quietly.

She really did love her and she hated that she hadn't figured this out before. It was one of those things she'd pushed to the furthest, darkest corners of her mind, filed under 'never gonna happen' and never gave it another thought. But she was thinking about it now, it wrapped itself around every though that raced through her mind. She was already halfway down the hallway when she heard Buffy faintly say her name and she stopped and slowly made her way back, leaning against the cool stone walls and listened.

"What happened to Faith?"

"Giles said she went off to Cleveland to help Robin out for a little while."

"I know where she is. I've called her cell, but she won't answer. It just keeps going straight to voicemail. I'm getting a little worried, Xander."

"It's Faith. You and I both know that she can take care of herself."

"I know, but it's not that. And with the new girl here...I don't know, Xander. I think I'm starting to feel..."

"Feel what, Buff?"

"Feelings!" Buffy said, her voice rising slightly. "For Satsu and you know how I feel about Faith. I...I'm starting to get really confused. None of this is making any sense anymore and this spell, this just makes me feel even more confused. True love kiss. What the hell kind of spell is that and why was I under it? There has to be a reason."

"These things just tend to happen. You know Willow is on this and after she and Kennedy finish arguing, she'll find the answers you're looking for."

Faith sighed softly as she pushed herself off the wall and headed for her room. Eavesdropping hadn't been the greatest idea she'd ever had. It was making her think and with the alcohol and the events that had unfolded, it was making the walls around her feel as if they were closing in and beginning to suffocate her.

Buffy had openly admitted to having feelings for her. She knew she should have stuck around and found out just what kind of feelings she had for her other than the obvious disapproval, slight tolerance and possibly hatred she already knew Buffy felt when it came to her. She couldn't shake the feeling that even though there was a prophecy that needed to be fulfilled in less than two weeks time, Buffy still wouldn't openly admit to having feelings for her or feelings for who she was, at least not while she was in the skin she was currently trapped in.

Faith laid back on the bed, wishing she was back in her own room. The small bed was uncomfortable, but it was liveable. She'd been in much worse situations in the past, slept on much worse.

"Nothing like a fucked up prophecy to mess with my head even more," she muttered angrily to herself before she closed her eyes and hoped for another dreamless night.


	4. Chapter 3

The morning was chaotic. The schedule had been thrown off due to Faith's sudden departure. She wanted to step up and offer to take over, but everyone saw her as the new girl and she still had to be properly trained. She knew she had to be trained. This body was different and it wasn't reacting quite the way she wanted it to. Giles told her it was a part of the spell and that over the course of the next two weeks she'd adjust and if the prophecy was fulfilled, she'd change back into her own self.

Never had she been to an early morning training session. Buffy handled those and she had to drag her ass out of bed and get down to the training room. If she was going to make this happen, she had to spend as much time as she could around Buffy without making it look too obvious. The first part of Willow's plan had been put into motion and all she had to do was take that next step in initiating some kind of conversation with Buffy.

Talk about the impossible.

But Faith being Faith, she was always up for a challenge. She couldn't back down from this one, especially not after the way she felt just from giving a simple kiss to Buffy while she slept. She barely slept all night, her mind only on that kiss. When she walked into the training room and caught Buffy's eyes as she sat by one of the windows, she knew that she hadn't slept much either.

"Training has been set back until this afternoon," Buffy said to her as she walked over and leaned against the windowsill.

"Oh."

"I could still show you a few things, if you'd like?"

"That's alright, Buffy. I'll wait until this afternoon."

"Wait," she sighed as she reached out and grabbed onto her wrist to keep her from walking away. "Do you know what happened last night?"

"I know there was a spell. I don't know much else."

Buffy looked at her with an eyebrow raised and hesitantly released her grip on her wrist. "Nobody is telling me anything. Nobody even knows who broke the spell!"

"Does that bother you?"

"Somebody kissed me. Someone that is in love with me. It hardly seems fair that I don't even know who it is!"

Faith nodded and shrugged and reached into her pocket and pulled out the chapstick. Her lips were dryer than she was used to and she wondered if it was the cool, damp air in the castle that was finally catching up to her. She looked over at Buffy who had a rather perplexed look on her face.

"Where did you get that?"

"Uh," Faith put the cap back on and stuck it back in her pocket. "I bought it on my way here. Why?"

"There's only one other person I know who uses cinnamon chapstick and she's not here right now."

"Ah."

Faith hoped Buffy wasn't about to figure things out. If she figured it out, the prophecy wouldn't happen. She stared at the floor, basking in the rather comfortable silence between them. She was waiting for Buffy to figure out the cinnamon thing though. It wouldn't take her too long and she could tell by the way Buffy nervously fidgeted beside her.

"Cinnamon...oh god," Buffy groaned as she laughed and shook her head. "Please don't tell me that you were the one who broke the spell?"

"I don't think so."

"Satsu, unless Faith is here and unless she's in love with me, or you are, one of you had to have been the one to break the spell. Oh god, I can't even believe this! Why would Faith be in love with me? She hates me!"

"I don't think she hates you."

"You don't even know her Satsu!"

Faith chuckled as she shook her head. Playing along with this was easy yet it was hard for her to keep a straight face and stick to being Satsu and not herself. "I've heard a few things about her."

"Like what?"

"Just that she's..." Faith trailed off, not so sure how to answer that question. "One of the original Slayers."

Buffy rolled her eyes at that and leaned against the glass of the window. "The Slayer line still runs through her, even now after all of you have been activated. It's a long story."

"I like long stories."

"Don't we all," Buffy replied wryly.

"I was going to ask you when you think I can go out on patrol. I've...never been."

"Never?"

"No," Faith shook her head, trying to stick to the story Willow had come up with. "When I was found I was sent straight here. Never been trained. I was told my Watcher had been looking for me long before you found the scythe and that she was killed before she even found me."

"You'll need to be trained before you can go out on patrol, Satsu. It could take months."

"I don't have months."

"What?"

"I meant that I don't want to wait months. How hard can it be? Fight, stake 'em and its done."

"Have you ever fought anything or anyone before?"

"Couple kids in school," Faith shrugged. "I wasn't strong then like I am now. I just want to get out there and kick some ass, you know?"

"You remind me of her."

"Of who?"

"Faith."

She felt like she wanted to get up and walk away, but she knew she couldn't. She wanted to hear what Buffy had to say even if she didn't like it.

"I don't mean that in a bad way," Buffy said after a moment and she flashed a rather sweet smile at her. "Just the way you talk, a little bit, it just reminds me of Faith."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, it's not."

Faith blinked a couple of times, trying to figure out just what the hell Buffy was thinking of. She was obviously holding back from saying what she really wanted to say. The look in her eyes spoke volumes to her and she knew she wasn't in the right position to ask her what she really thought about Faith. A couple of girls walked into the training room and headed for the treadmills, ignoring the two of them as they laughed and talked about the new patrol schedule.

"Maybe I could take you along with us tonight?"

"You mean it?"

"I mean, we'll train this morning, just you and me and later with everyone else. Just as long as you promise me you won't jump in and try to take care of things yourself on patrol tonight," Buffy said with a smile as she stood up and motioned for Faith to follow her.

They started stretching out on the mats and Faith found it nearly impossible to take her eyes off of Buffy. At least now she could look at her and not feel afraid Buffy would turn around and possibly punch her in the face. It'd happened one too many times. One little glance, one little smirk and she found herself on the floor with a swollen jaw, sometimes a cut lip or a barely there black eye. She didn't miss it either. Buffy had one hell of a right hook and she wanted to avoid it for as long as she could.

Her patience would be put to test throughout the day. She hated training, but she couldn't show it. Not in this body. Once she stretched out and got used to the way the body moved, she stood up and got ready for whatever Buffy was about to put her through. Buffy didn't say a word, she just began circling her and Faith fell back into a fight stance and puckered her lips at Buffy, knowing all she needed was to be edged on.

"What was that?"

"What was what?" Faith asked innocently, winking as she playfully tapped her fist against Buffy's shoulder.

"Oh, is this how you want it?" Buffy laughed as she shook her head. "We can't just fall into sparring without..."

Faith spun around and kicked her, not too hard but hard enough to make her stumble back a couple of feet. Faith was enjoying herself a little too much. She'd never get away with doing that to Buffy in her own body without being sent to a world of pain a few seconds later.

"Without what, Buffy?"

"Where did you learn how to do that?"

"Years of watching martial arts movies," Faith laughed as she pushed back the strands of hair that covered her face. "That and I'm just going on instinct."

"In that case," Buffy smiled at her as she walked back up to her. "Show me what you got and by all means, do not hold back on my account. You can't hurt me."

They fell into a pattern soon after, a kick here and there, a punch following the kick. Faith held herself back, she was afraid if she came off too strong that Buffy would start to question things. None of the younger Slayers had that kind of power, not like she and Buffy did. She could still feel that power inside of her, despite it not being her own body, and it was getting stronger by the minute.

Buffy took it one step too far and with a deafening crack to the side of Faith's head, she was down and out. She wasn't out too long and she opened her eyes and found Buffy kneeling beside her, tenderly stroking the slight bump on her cheek.

"Sorry."

"I'll live," Faith smirked, sighing as she sat up slowly. "Got yourself one hell of a right hook."

"So I've been told before. You'll be okay?"

"Yeah, of course I will."

"I'll take you out tonight," Buffy said softly, looking quickly at the girls who had gathered around them to find out what had happened. "You are strong and you seem to fight well. I want to see how you fight in the field."

"Cool."

"I think that's probably the best way for you to learn."

Faith smirked as she stood up slowly and watched as Buffy walked away. It hadn't gone exactly to plan, but the ball was rolling and it was now time for her to up the ante. She left the training room, a little sore, but pleased and headed off to find Willow and Giles.

The morning definitely had gone differently than she had expected it. At least things were going somewhere with Buffy now. She just had to play her cards right and not overstep the boundaries too soon. The last thing she needed was for Buffy to run scared and she'd be stuck in this body forever. She wasn't about to let that happen. She couldn't let it happen. If it meant having Buffy find out that she loved her, that she loved Faith, while she was someone else, then she'd have to do whatever it took to make her figure it out. There was no other way, no other choice. Her fate had been laid out on the line and all she had to do was go with it, no more questions asked.

"Somebody needs to give me a fucking Oscar or something," Faith laughed as she walked into Giles' office and closed the door behind her.

"Why?" Willow asked as she looked up from the book she had been reading. "Aren't you supposed to be training right now?"

"Sparred with B for a little while. She got me and knocked me out, but she's taking me out tonight."

"Like a date?" Willow chuckled as Faith joined her on the couch. "You sure move quickly, don't you?"

"No. It's not a date, Red. She said something about hands on training. Just the two of us."

"Is that wise?" Giles asked as he stood up from his chair and picked up a few papers from the desk. "I know we need to get this prophecy fulfilled, but I do not believe Buffy is thinking rationally. She would never take an untrained girl out on patrol so soon."

"Maybe she sees some potential in me," Faith boasted as she smiled widely. "Hey, Buffy never has been wrong about anything. I'll admit that much. If she thinks I'll 'learn' better being out on the field then who are we to question her?"

"Be as that may, Faith, I do not believe this is going to get the prophecy fulfilled."

"G, you have no idea what slaying does to us, do you?" Faith chuckled as she ran her fingers through her hair. "Believe me, after tonight, the prophecy will definitely be pretty much fulfilled."

"Confident, are you?" Willow asked, smirking as she closed her book and stared at her. "I don't think Buffy would sleep with you so soon. You have to build up to it."

"You obviously don't know what it's like to be a Slayer."

"No, I don't. But I do know what it's like to be with a Slayer and I do know Buffy a hell of a lot better than you ever will."

"Girls..." Giles sighed as he stopped them from continuing. "Faith, you will go out on patrol with Buffy tonight as she wants to. I'll send a team in for backup just in case. You are not used to this body and this body isn't used to having the power and the strength you still have inside of you. I do not want to see you get hurt."

"Not gonna get hurt, G. I can take care of myself."

"Where are you going?" Giles asked as Faith stood up and headed for the door. "We still have to talk about how you are planning to handle this."

"I'll handle it. Have a little faith in me for once," she said softly as she opened the door. "I'll let you know how it goes."

With that, she walked out of the office and shut the door behind her. She could hear the entire castle full of life, of laughter, of power. She could feel Buffy there somewhere too. She'd always been able to feel Buffy, but it was stronger now. The kiss had set something off deep inside of her and it made her wonder if it had done the same thing for Buffy. As strange as this whole prophecy had sounded to her, she knew there was a deeper meaning to the whole thing. There had to be if someone or something, specifically the Powers that Be, had gone to these lengths to make sure it happened.

She made sure nobody was around as she made her way to her room. She just needed to sleep in her own bed for a couple of hours. She needed something familiar, something that she knew. She just needed a couple of hours to make sense of everything and to refresh her mind and rest her body. She needed to be ready for tonight and she needed to come up with a plan to get things going with Buffy. She couldn't be pushy, she couldn't be needy, then again the more she thought about it, that's exactly what Buffy fell for every time.

At least that's how she saw it all. Buffy always went for the darker ones, the ones with a root of evil deep inside of them. She tried not to think of all the things that the two of them had gone through over the years and it was next to impossible now. Buffy had forgiven her for trying to drown her. It was unspoken forgiveness between them. Faith knew as soon as the prophecy was over and she was back to being herself that the two of them would need to work out the riffs in their past, one by one. If Buffy had a type, Faith knew that she definitely fell into that mould aside from the fact that she was a woman and all of Buffy's prior relationships that she was aware of had been with men. Two vamps and a soldier to be specific.

Nearly begging for sleep now, she closed her eyes as she buried her face into her pillow. Three days ago she never thought she'd find herself in this situation. She never thought there'd ever be a situation quite like this. Her life was full of complications, and it wasn't just because she was a Slayer. It was just who she was and what she surrounded herself with. One door always closed while five others opened, each one luring her in with false hopes and unfulfilled promises.

Her fate was a mess and she had to wonder if this prophecy was more about her than it was about Buffy. She'd find out sooner or later.


	5. Chapter 4

A/N: I borrowed a couple lines from the comics for this chapter and despite the way the one scene went in the comics (issue 11 I believe), I of course have twisted it around my own way. Yes I know this fic is becoming a tease, don't worry, we're about halfway through it all now...good stuff is a comin'...soonish :p

* * *

The cemetery was quiet, as most cemeteries were in the middle of the night. Faith stood on top of the large stone wall that surrounded the cemetery and watched as Buffy effortlessly flipped down to the ground. She waited, not looking back up at her and Faith followed, trying her own flip and failing miserably as she fell face first into a puddle of mud.

"Ow."

"And what have we learned?"

Faith groaned as she sat up slowly. She chuckled to herself as she tried to look at Buffy. "That Scotland is wet and slippery?"

"Do I look amused?"

"I can't really say."

Faith wiped the mud from her face as she stood up and looked around the cemetery. Even though her senses were slightly duller now she wasn't in her own body, she still knew there were plenty of vamps lurking in the shadows all around them. They were quiet as they stood there staring at one another for a moment. Faith wasn't sure what to say as she fought an inner battle with her old self to make some crude remark about how hot Buffy looked in her slaying gear.

"It was you, wasn't it?" Buffy asked quietly, breaking the heavy silence that filled the distance between them. "I know that you are the one who broke the spell."

"I..."

"Don't lie to me, Satsu. I'm tired of everyone lying to me. The only reason I brought you out here tonight is because I needed to talk to you about that spell and the kiss."

"I don't know what to say, Buffy."

"What do you know about the spell?"

"I know nothing."

"And the kiss? You love me? You don't even know me. How can you be in love with me? Maybe it's just some crush?"

"It's not a crush, Buffy."

"You think I don't realize that?" Buffy snapped as she turned to face her, stopping both of them dead in their tracks in the middle of the cemetery. "You know something? It's dangerous for you to be in love with me. Sweet as it is and flattering as it is, it's dangerous."

With a swift kick, Buffy kicked her back into a group of vampires as they came out from the closest crypt. It took Faith a second to realize what had just happened and she fell into the fight naturally, a little too naturally and one by one she picked off the vamps, decapitating two of them with the sword she carried and dusted the last two without even breaking a sweat.

"How is it dangerous?"

"We are not talking about this," Buffy sighed out as she leaned against the crypt and closed her eyes, breathing in and out deeply to mask the shuddering breaths she took. "I am supposed to be training you and with the skills you just showed there, I don't think you need as much training as I thought you did. You're good. Really good."

Faith grinned, her heart racing a little as she moved to stand next to Buffy. She was craving a cigarette, badly, but she knew she couldn't. 'Satsu' didn't smoke, she didn't drink, and she was supposed to be the all-around good girl, much like Buffy made herself appear to everyone around them. Faith knew better. Buffy wasn't as good as most of the girls believed her to be. One too many nights Buffy had joined her at the pub a few miles from the castle and had gotten so drunk that Faith had practically carried her home. But that was in the past, the recent past, and she wasn't about to bring it up. 'Satsu' didn't know about those things nor would there be any reason for her to.

The moonlight shone off the blade on the scythe, drawing Faith out from her thoughts and she turned to look up at Buffy and smiled a little. Buffy was comfortable around her as Satsu, she could feel that much. Buffy's eyes met hers and they just stared at one another for the longest time, neither of them saying a word. Faith found it too easy to become completely lost in those hazel eyes that never had looked at her the way they were then.

Four more vamps came out from the shadows and attacked them. Faith fell back, unable to keep her eyes off of Buffy as she watched her fight. She didn't care that she was letting the two she was fighting get the upper hand, the sight of Buffy fighting them effortlessly turned her on to no end. She barely blinked and found herself being thrown halfway across the cemetery by one of the vamps. She must have hit her head because everything went black. When she came to, Buffy was kneeling next to her, gently stroking the back of her head as she helped her sit up.

"Do you knock yourself unconscious a lot?"

"Not that I know of no, and it's not always my doing," Faith replied, laughing as she let Buffy pull her to her feet. "You have one hell of a right hook, Buffy. You can knock me out any day."

"Right," Buffy smirked as she shook her head and brushed off the dirt on her knees. "That was an accident. What just happened now was no accident. While you are out here you must keep your eyes open at all times and you must not let anything distract you."

Faith wiggled her eyebrows a little and it caused Buffy to blush slightly as she backed away from her, neither of them having noticed until Buffy backed away how close they'd been standing together. The way Buffy's eyes quickly darted away let Faith know that the talk she had planned to have with her wasn't quite going the way she had wanted it to. Another four vampires came after them and Buffy only laughed as she pushed Faith out of the way.

"What is with them coming in fours tonight?" Buffy asked as she managed to dust all four of them in less than a minute with not much of a fight. "I thought bad things came in threes not in fours?"

"Don't know," Faith shrugged as she gripped her stake for a moment before sliding it into her belt. "Think there's some kind of hidden meaning being it all?"

"Satsu, I think its sweet you are in love with me and I really am flattered and..."

"That wasn't what I was talking about," Faith laughed softly as she shook her head. "And...please continue. I'm interested in what you were going to say now."

"I wasn't going to..."

"You were."

Buffy sighed out, clearly annoyed, but the playful smirk on her face gave it away. Faith tried to figure out if this was Buffy's weird way of flirting with her, with 'Satsu' and decided it was probably just her mind playing tricks on her yet again. Buffy never said anything and she just started to walk away leaving Faith no other choice but to follow her. Whatever Buffy had been about to say, she was holding herself back from saying it now. Faith didn't want to push her, but that voice inside her head, Willow's specifically, reminded her she had less than two weeks.

They walked around the cemetery about a dozen times. They talked about small things, mostly about training and Faith knew exactly what Buffy was doing. She was avoiding talking about anything personal. There had to be a reason for that. Was she attracted to her, to 'Satsu' or was she starting to realize something else? Was she starting to figure out that Faith wasn't really who she appeared to be and was putting up her ever familiar walls once again? Faith groaned out as she stopped walking and looked up at the lightening sky and closed her eyes.

"We done for tonight?"

"Yes, the sun is just starting to rise. I don't think there'll be any more vamps or demons out tonight."

"Buffy?" Faith stopped her as she started to walk away. "Thanks for this."

"It's nothing. I hate going out on patrol alone and with Faith gone I...it's nothing, let's just get back to the castle and get some rest."

They had been skirting around talking about love, about life, and about Faith all night. Faith was getting tired of it. She was getting rather confused too. Buffy had always been a hard one to crack. She never could begin to scratch the surface when it came to understanding her. She was starting to see why they'd never gotten along in all the years they'd known each other. She knew she had to do something before they got back to the castle. With a timeline on the prophecy, she had to up her game and yet be subtle and sweet and rather coy about it at the same time.

They stopped when they reached the road that led to the castle. Buffy looked upset and Faith knew it, she'd felt it before she even saw the tears fall from Buffy's eyes. She did something then that she had never done before, at least not with Buffy, she hugged her. As soon as her arms were around Buffy, she felt her relax and tense up as the tears continued to fall.

"What are you crying for?"

"I don't know," Buffy laughed softly as she held onto her and continued to cry in her arms. "I really don't know."

"Could always talk to me."

She was starting to see a whole new light to this whole 'being someone else' thing. This was going to give her the chance to see a whole different side of Buffy while, unknown to Buffy, giving Buffy the chance to see the softer side of her. She had it in her. She could be caring and all that crap Buffy needed the most. At least she'd be willing to try to be all of those things. She was really starting to wonder about the prophecy too. Why now, why so many years after all the bad had went down? The main questions being more of the why now than anything else.

She knew what Giles and Willow had told her and although there hadn't been much, it made sense in the littlest of ways. They were both alone, both feeling lost and unloved and she wasn't sure about Buffy, but she knew she was definitely in love whether she wanted to be or not. She let go of Buffy and gently wiped away her tears, watching as Buffy stared into her eyes with such intensity she felt almost overwhelmed.

"You'll be okay?" Faith asked softly, knowing that if anything now would be the perfect time to kiss her. "Buffy?"

"I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"It's just been a very long night, that's all and with the spell thing, I can't stop thinking about it."

"Me neither," Faith admitted as her hands dropped from Buffy's face and she forced a smile. "Don't worry about it, B...uffy."

"B?"

"I said Buffy."

"No, you didn't."

"Slip of the tongue," she shrugged, trying not to panic. She knew she'd slip up on the name. Nobody called Buffy 'B' but her.

"Right. I guess those things kind of happen, huh?"

"Honest mistake," Faith said quickly. "Does it bother you?"

"No...a little...I don't know," Buffy stammered as she walked over to a fallen tree and sat down heavily, sighing as she looked up at Faith. "There are a lot of things that you say or do that keep reminding me of someone else."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Yes."

Faith frowned as she sat down next to her, keeping her distance knowing Buffy would need a bit of space. "What, is that a bad thing? Are you two not friends?"

"We are. It's just...complicated."

"Oh."

"I shouldn't even be telling you this considering how you feel about me, Satsu, but I think I..."

Faith held her breath as Buffy trailed off, her voice faltering as she leaned back a little and looked up at the brightening sky through the trees. She held her breath for one of two reasons. One being the prophecy could be fulfilled a hell of a lot sooner than she thought and two, she was scared shitless of what Buffy was going to say next.

"I just miss her. Even when she's here, I miss her. Isn't that crazy?"

"No," Faith replied, letting the breath she'd been holding out slowly. It somehow felt wrong to be talking to Buffy about her while she was someone else. It gave her a foul taste in her mouth she couldn't quite get rid of. Yet she knew she had to keep the conversation going. The prophecy did depend on it after all. "Do you, you know, have feelings for her in more than a friendly way?"

"For Faith?" Buffy laughed and she shook her head, but the slight tremble in her voice gave her away. "By feelings do you mean that I sometimes feel like I want to beat some sense into that thick skull of hers with my fists? Then yes, I have those kinds of feelings."

"Wasn't what I was asking."

"Satsu," Buffy said as she reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder. "You ever have a friend, well someone that's almost a friend, and you have these mixed feelings for them and you never know how to make sense of any of them? That's how it is with Faith. Sometimes I don't even know what I feel for her."

"Have you ever tried to figure it out?"

"No. It's too much of a mess and you can forget even talking to her about these kinds of things. She's got a one-track mind, always looking for one thing. Get some and get gone. So you can just imagine if I tell her that I have feelings for her. She's going to want to get me in her bed and kick me out in the morning just like she always does."

The words hurt. They cut her deep. She couldn't believe Buffy thought of her that way even after all those years and especially in the last couple of months. She hadn't been that Faith since she got out of prison and she wasn't going to be that Faith ever again. That was in her past; she'd locked it up in and basically threw away the key.

"People change, don't they?" Faith asked, hoping she didn't look as upset as she felt.

"Faith doesn't change."

"Don't have a lot of faith in her, do you?"

"I have reasons not to."

"Oh," she sighed softly as she stood up and looked down at Buffy. "We should get back."

"Yeah, we should."

"Thanks again for taking me out."

"Thank you for listening to me ramble on about stuff you wouldn't understand," Buffy laughed as she stood up and gave her a quick hug.

Faith back away from her and started walking towards the castle, making sure she was a good twenty feet ahead of Buffy before she let the tears fall. She was going to screw the prophecy up if she couldn't keep her emotions in check. She'd almost slipped up twice now.

"Once a failure, always a failure," she muttered under her breath as she flung open the main doors and headed for the back stairs.

"F...Satsu!" Willow called out as she ran past Willow's room. "What happened? Are you crying?"

"Leave me alone, Will."

"What happened?"

"I fucked up, okay! She's never going to admit she loves me! Might as well get used to calling me Satsu from here on out cos this prophecy isn't gonna be fulfilled any time soon!"

She left Willow standing there in the corridor with her mouth open, her eyes wide and a sleepy Kennedy walking out to find out of the bedroom to find out what the commotion was all about. She looked back only once before she ran down to her room and slammed the door shut behind her. She breathed heavily as she leaned against the door, trying to keep the tears from falling, but they wouldn't stop. They burned her cheeks as they fell endlessly and she slid down to the floor and buried her face into her hands.

She had less than eleven days to make this happen. Despite the setback and the fury of new emotions she was experiencing, she still had a string of determination to make this happen along with a hell of a lot of doubt thrown in with it. She had to get over her doubts, her fears and her emotions or else she'd definitely be stuck as she was now.


	6. Chapter 5

The first thing she noticed when she woke up later in the morning and showered was the faint, but distinct scar on her stomach. The scar Buffy had given her when she plunged her own knife into her gut so long ago. She spent the longest time standing under the hot spray of the water, running her fingers over the scar over and over again. She hadn't noticed the scar before since the change she'd taken. As soon as she was out of the shower and dressed she headed for Giles' office.

"Got us a little problem," she said as she flung open the door and found only Willow in his office. "Where's G?"

"He's gone out. What is the problem, Faith?"

"This," she said abruptly as she pulled up her shirt a little and pointed to the scar. "This wasn't there last night, at least not in this body. This is the scar from when..."

"She stabbed you," Willow said softly as she stood up from behind the desk and walked over to Faith. "Wow. So it just appeared overnight?"

"Yeah."

"What happened on patrol with you and Buffy?"

"We talked, we slayed, we flirted, and I nearly got my ass kicked. This body sucks, Red!"

"I think the prophecy is beginning to come to," she said under her breath as she watched Faith pull her shirt back down and smooth it out. "Have you noticed any other changes?"

"No."

"It's nothing major, Faith. I wouldn't worry about it."

She sighed out loudly, rolling her eyes as she sat down on the couch and closed her eyes. "Aren't you gonna like, research this or something?"

"I have a feeling that you'll see subtle changes over time. Whatever happened last night between you two, I think she's starting to realize a couple of things."

"Like how she feels about me?"

"Something like that. This prophecy is tricky, Faith. You need to understand that we don't know everything we need to know. It's going to be touch and go for awhile, at least until it is fulfilled."

"Subtle changes are a good sign, right? It means that it could actually be fulfilled and I can go back to being me."

Willow nodded her head and forced a smile as Faith looked up at her. "You need to step up, Faith. If you are really determined to end this, you need to figure out a way to get her thinking more about how she really, truly feels about you. And no, before you even ask, I can't do any more spells. It could complicate things. We can't risk it."

With a heavy sigh, Faith got up from the couch and headed for the door. She left Giles' office and headed back to her temporary room. It was still much too early in the day for her to go down to the training room. Buffy wouldn't be there yet and she was in no mood to deal with anyone else. She was nearly at the door when she heard Buffy and Xander talking quietly just around the corner of the long corridor. She didn't want to eavesdrop on their conversation and from the parts she did manage to pick up they weren't talking about anything of interest to her.

She really did need to step up her game. At the rate she was going, she'd never get anywhere with Buffy in less than two weeks. She slammed the door behind her and walked over to the window and opened it, letting in the fresh yet damp air. She grabbed her smokes off the dresser and lit one, inhaling deeply so quickly she felt light-headed. The light knock on her door made her jump and she took a quick drag before she flicked the cigarette out the window and walked over to the door.

"Can we talk?" Buffy asked as soon as she had opened the door. Without waiting for Faith to answer her, she walked into the room and sat down on the bed. "I want to talk about patrol."

"Sure, come on in," Faith muttered as she rolled her eyes and closed the door.

"Satsu?"

"What?"

"Were you smoking?"

"Uh...no?"

Buffy raised an eyebrow then shook her head as she looked around the messy room. "I didn't take you for a liar."

"Fine. I was smoking. Are you happy now?"

"Yes."

"You gonna grill me about my habits or are you going to talk about whatever it is you wanted to talk about?"

Faith could hardly keep her anger in check and she breathed out heavily as she walked over to the window and closed it. She was revealing too much of her own personality and when she saw the way Buffy was staring at her she knew she was becoming rather suspicious about her attitude.

"Sorry, haven't had much sleep," Faith muttered as she tried to come up with a believable enough excuse for reacting the way she had.

"I actually didn't want to talk about patrol," Buffy admitted. "I wanted to talk about...uh, you."

"Me?"

"I feel like I know you. We've never met before, have we?"

"No, we haven't."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Huh," Buffy mused as she stared up at her. "Like I said last night, you really remind me of someone else. I can't really figure out why you do though. It's funny because you two are nothing alike."

"Really? Maybe you are wrong? Maybe we are alike and you just don't see it."

Buffy only shrugged as she looked down at the floor. "Maybe. Sometimes the way you talk, the way you react, I just...I see so much of her in you and it scares me a little. I don't even know why it scares me either, Satsu. I can't even figure it out for myself. Xander thinks I'm going crazy. He is the one who told me I should come and talk to you and try to sort this out."

"What is there to even sort out?"

"Satsu, I can't figure out how I feel about you right now. You just showed up here without any kind of notice, without any warning and seemingly out of nowhere and yet," she laughed before she stood up from the bed and began to pace. "And yet, Giles and Willow kind of just welcomed you here with open arms, no questions asked. I have to say I am rather suspicious about you."

Faith bit her lip. She was panicking and she tried not to visibly show it. She had no idea what to say to that. What could she say without revealing the truth and screwing the prophecy up before she had a decent chance to make it happen? Buffy stopped pacing when she didn't answer her and she backed her up to the wall and placed her hands on the wall on either side of her head.

"Got nothing to say?"

"Nope. I don't have to explain myself to you."

"Then can you try to at least explain why I feel this connection to you? I don't even know you!"

"Connection?" Faith asked, smirking at her when she didn't move away. "Don't all of us have some kind of connection to each other, being slayers and all?"

"It's not that kind of a connection, Satsu."

"Then I don't know what to tell you."

She watched closely as Buffy ran her tongue over her bottom lip and she involuntarily shuddered as Buffy moved in a little closer. She never figured Buffy to be the one to make the first move, especially not with another woman. She wasn't going to say anything that would end up pushing her away. She wanted to see just where Buffy was taking this. The only thing she hated was when Buffy said the name Satsu. It made her cringe in the worst way and it really made her realize just how real she'd made this person she now was.

She was starting to feel rather pathetic. She normally wouldn't let this little game they were now playing go on this far without making a move of her own first. It was different with Buffy and she wasn't sure if it was because she knew she loved her or if it was because of something else entirely that she hadn't yet figured out.

Wherever her train of thought was heading, it came to a screeching halt the instant Buffy kissed her. For a simple, light kiss, it made her body tense and go limp at the same time with pleasure. She kissed her back, pulling her in close to her as she backed her up to the bed. She was no longer thinking with her mind or her heart. Her libido and years of wanting Buffy were taking over in full force. The kiss had set her off and when Buffy pulled back as the backs of her legs hit the bed, Faith struggled to regain control over herself.

"I'm sorry I..."

"I'm sorry," Buffy stammered as she stepped back. "I don't know why I kissed you."

"You don't have to apologize."

"I do. Wait, why were you sorry?"

"For kissing you back," Faith replied as she ran her hands through her hair and stopped when she realized what she was doing. She couldn't help it. It was a nervous trait of hers and she really had to stop with her old habits before Buffy really started to figure out there was seriously something off about her. "I guess this is one of those things you can't explain, huh?"

"I guess," Buffy replied as she shrugged her shoulders. "I've never done that before. I don't even know what came over me just now."

"Buffy, don't try to understand it. It really isn't worth feeling confused and conflicted over."

Faith was trying to keep her cool, trying to play it off as if it was nothing. She still felt like she should apologize for almost attempting to take it further than just a kiss. As far as she knew, sex wasn't something Buffy just jumped into with just anyone. Then again, she figured she could be wrong about that too. She'd been wrong about Buffy plenty of times before in the past.

"You know what I think?"

"What, Buffy?"

"I think ever since I figured out that it was you that woke me up from that spell I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. It's not just you I've been thinking about either."

"No?"

"But that is a whole other conversation that I am so not about to attempt to have right now and especially not with you. It's just...awkward to say the least. I don't even know what I am doing, Satsu!"

"We are just talking."

"We're talking about things I never thought I'd find myself talking to anyone else about, much less thinking about it constantly in my head. Things have been going crazy for the last while and with you here now, I don't know, it's just becoming crazier. Too crazy to understand. I want to understand what the hell is going on!"

Buffy started pacing again, looking frantic and nervous and on the verge of having an emotional breakdown. Faith tried to stop her as she began muttering something under her breath that she couldn't quite hear or understand. Buffy shook her hand off of her shoulder and headed for the door. Without saying a word and without even looking back at her, she left.

"Just when I think it can't get any more fucking confusing, that happens!" Faith groaned as she walked over to the window, opening it again and lighting another cigarette, hoping that this time she'd at least be able to finish it.

Whatever was going through Buffy's mind was controlling her actions and Faith wanted nothing more than to know exactly what she was thinking. She needed to make sense of it all and she laughed at herself when she realized that for the first time she actually cared about what Buffy was thinking about her, if she was even thinking about her at all. Buffy had kissed 'Satsu'. It wasn't really her. She didn't know if she should feel offended by that or if she should be glad she wasn't technically the first.

Rather not dwell on what happened, she tried to push it to the furthest, darkest corner of her mind and tried to relax. Her mind wouldn't let her relax and over and over again she thought about what had just happened. What really did happen? Buffy was confused, she was feeling conflicted and Faith knew it was for two reasons and possibly a third she still hadn't quite been able to figure out. Her body and her mind were exhausted and she chalked it all up to her being too tired to make any sense of the situation. She even tried convincing herself that it was all just a dream, just a dream like many others she'd had over the years, dreams she'd always forgotten minutes after she had woken up.

It started to make a little more sense to her as to why she needed to be someone else other than herself for the prophecy to even exist. There was so much preventing them from becoming close enough to sharing even the littlest things about each other, things friends should know about. They weren't even friends; at least she didn't see it that way. There had always been too much standing in between them for them to be friends. Their past, their present and even their unknown future together affected every bit of whatever relationship they did have with one another. For Buffy to really see her as she was, she had to see her through someone else. It was the only way.

Maybe the Powers that Be had a greater plan for her than just that of fulfilling the so-called prophecy that made no sense and yet all at the same time it made perfect sense in a very unexplained way. She had never experienced love, always having pushed it away or just generally never giving anyone the option or a reason to love her. Maybe the Powers that Be had decided, in their own twisted and mysterious way, it was time for her to move beyond what she'd always known and the only way that was possible was to be trapped as someone else until she finally gave in. It was also the only way for Buffy to come to realization of just how she felt about her and figure out just what she meant to her.

She knew one thing for sure though. If the Powers that Be truly had a bigger plan for her, she wasn't ready for it just yet. It did help explain the series of rather unusual events that had unfolded over the past couple of days. What it didn't explain was why Buffy had kissed her pretty much out of nowhere. Whatever Buffy was going through was causing her to react the way she was. Faith could sympathize. She'd never felt more confused and conflicted than she was feeling since the Powers that Be changed her for the prophecy.

Taking one last drag of her cigarette, she tossed it out the window and hesitated for a moment before she left her room and went to find Buffy. She was letting her emotions drive her now, more than they ever had. The kiss still lingered on her lips and the thought of pushing the boundaries beyond the kiss lingered there on her mind. It had more to do with just fulfilling the prophecy; it was about finally taking what she wanted.

She found Buffy just outside her door when she opened it and with a sly smirk, she grabbed onto Buffy and kissed her. It was far from tender, far from sweet. It was full of hidden passion and need and when Buffy feverishly kissed her back, she took it as a sign that Buffy wanted exactly what she did.

"Wait..." Buffy breathed out heavily as she pushed Faith away from her before she could pull her back into the room. "What is going on, Satsu?"

"It's what you want, isn't it?"

"I don't know what I want!"

"What were you waiting out here for?"

"I wanted to talk to you, but I just don't know how. There's so much that I'm feeling right now and I don't even know if I am feeling this way for you or if I am feeling it for her."

"Who?"

"Faith!"

She tried to keep from smiling at that, but it was hard not to. Buffy was thinking about her and even as conflicted as she was, Faith knew she knew exactly what she wanted. She was just afraid to admit it. Fighting back her urges to kiss her again, she dropped her hands from her hips and leaned against the doorframe, studying her, waiting for her to say something, for her to say anything.

"Faith isn't here, is she?" Faith asked her softly and when Buffy shook her head no, she took both her hands and pulled her back into the room. "I don't care what you are feeling right now. If it's her you want, that's fine. I can deal with that. What I can't deal with is you coming here, saying the things you have said and kiss me the way you have and leave without staying to talk about it. You know exactly what you want, you are just afraid to take it."

She felt her heart drop when she saw the tears in Buffy's eyes. She knew it wasn't supposed to have gone this way at all and it was much too late to change the road they were both on. She had to fix it and she didn't even know how. She had to figure it out soon. There was no way in hell she'd live with herself if she ended up hurting Buffy.


	7. Chapter 6

Faith wandered around the castle after Buffy had left. They didn't say anything more. What more was there to be said? Faith knew Buffy was more than confused about how she was feeling and she knew that Buffy needed her space to try and figure things out.

"Faith?" Giles said softly as she rounded the corner and nearly ran into him. "I've been looking for you all afternoon. Willow told me what happened this morning. Where have you been?"

"Thinking."

"Do I dare ask about what?"

"Buffy," she muttered as she shrugged her shoulders. "I think I'm fucking everything up!"

Giles sighed as he motioned for her to follow him to his office. As soon as they were inside and the door was closed he sighed once again and leaned against his desk. "Why do you think you've fucked everything up?"

"She kissed me," she said under her breath as she lowered her eyes to the floor. "She kissed me, Giles! I don't even know why she did. I'm starting to feel really fucking confused about everything too. This is a hell of a lot harder to figure out than I thought it was going to be. I'm a fucking mess right now and I don't know how to fix it."

"Buffy isn't easy to understand. I do understand how it can be confusing for both of you, however, I've found out more about this prophecy and this is just one of the many rough paths you both have to walk down."

"Giles, we don't have time for this kind of shit! I'm tired of this, I'm tired of feeling this way and I'm tired of being stuck in this fucking body! Do you know that she's suspicious of me? She's asking me questions I cannot answer! I can't hide who I really am from her for much longer. It's tearing me apart inside."

"Faith, sit down," he said calmly. "You are freaking out and I suspect that is normal considering the circumstances. This prophecy is rather unorthodox and yes, I know it doesn't make much sense, but I can promise you that once all is said and done, it will."

"I take one step forward and I fall back right to square one. I'm afraid I'll end up hurting her! Do you believe that? I actually care about that!"

"Faith, please, sit down."

She groaned as she sat down on the chair in front of him and crossed her arms over her chest. "What did you find out about the prophecy?"

"It is more than just having you both figure out how you feel about one another. It's about finding yourselves, harnessing the hidden power that has yet to be unleashed because you both have been unable to see yourselves and each other as you really are."

"How the hell can she see me for who I really am if I am not even me? Do you understand why I am getting so fucking pissed off and confused, Giles?"

"I do understand. What you don't understand is that you have to go through everything you are feeling right now, as does Buffy. I must say, you two are acting rather childish."

"What?!"

"It's not easy figuring out you feel a certain way about someone you once were enemies with. Have you ever stopped to think about why you two have the past you have?"

"Cos of our 'hidden' feelings for each other?" Faith muttered as she rolled her eyes. "Giles, I know how I feel about her now. I'm not fucking suppressing it and denying it anymore. What's the point? It's gonna drive me insane either way. I should just tell her everything. Maybe it'd make it easier? Hell, who knows, it could change me back!"

"Or it could do quite the opposite. It's better for her to know as little as possible, Faith. I will not allow you to jeopardize this prophecy because you cannot deal with the consequences that come with it."

"I just want to go back to being me," she sighed, feeling as if she was about to break down and cry. "I can't deal with this. I really can't. I'm not ready to deal with this. Ever wonder if I wasn't out there that night that maybe this would have never happened?"

"Everything, unfortunately, happens for a reason, Faith."

"Fate, yeah. I got that."

Giles shook his head as he walked over to where the Scotch was hidden and pulled out the bottle. He found two small glasses and poured them each a half glass. He handed Faith one and walked to his chair and sat down. She was breathing heavily as she tried to calm herself down. It was hard to calm herself down when she was feeling too much all at once.

"Buffy came to talk to me about an hour ago about you."

"About who? Me or Satsu?"

"Both."

"And?"

"She wanted to know when you were coming back and how she could get in touch with you. I told her that I didn't know how to get in contact with you and that you'd come back when the mission was completed. I've never seen her so..."

"So what?"

"Conflicted," he finished quietly. "I must agree with you when you say that this prophecy is completely fucked up."

Faith chuckled as she took a small sip and placed the glass on the desk in front of her. "I really need to figure out a lot of shit, don't I?"

"You and Buffy both do. Unfortunately, you won't be able to force her to admit anything nor will you be able to force her to think about how she really feels about you. Her seeing this Satsu instead of you, it's confusing her. She told me that ever since you came here, she's been feeling things she's not sure of and it is scaring her. She thinks you are a threat and I believe she only thinks that because she is unsure of how she feels."

"What am I gonna do then, G? Cos I have no idea how to fix what happened between us earlier."

For the first time, Faith could see how uncomfortable Giles really was talking about this. She didn't blame him though. It was unusual and unexpected and unorthodox.

"You need to talk to her again, Faith. You need to try to convey your feelings for her without making her further suspicious of who you really are. She needs to see that what you feel is real whether or not it is coming from you or Satsu."

Faith closed her eyes, wishing she'd just wake up from this nightmare. She needed to fix everything and she needed to apologize to Buffy first and foremost. The kiss had been unexpected for sure, but it was just a sign that Buffy was starting to give into whatever she was feeling. She downed the rest of her drink and left Giles' office.

It didn't take her very long before she found Buffy out on the balcony near her room. Buffy didn't turn around, barely even acknowledging her presence. Faith leaned against the stone railing next to her and sighed as she turned to look at her. Faith could see a fury of emotions displayed unguarded in Buffy's eyes. She could also practically see the wheels turning in her head as she looked over at her and frowned.

"Satsu...I am not in the mood to talk. I just want to be alone."

"I know. I'm sorry. I'll just talk then."

"I'm not in the mood to listen either. What happened this morning, I don't know how to explain it, but it's thrown me into a vicious cycle. I think about you and it turns into me thinking about her. I keep trying to figure out what I want and any answers I do manage to come up with don't make any sense."

Faith nodded as she looked away from her. "I know where you are coming from. I'm feeling the same way right now, kind of."

"I think..." Buffy trailed off and started laughing. "I can't even believe I'm saying this and to you, of all people, but I think I'm in love with her."

Faith held her breath, for some reason expecting to turn back into herself in that moment and when she opened her eyes, she found Buffy staring at her, looking rather confused. "I'm sorry did you just say you are in love with her?"

"I don't know if I am or if I just feel this way because of how I feel about you. I've never felt so confused before. I don't even know how to figure it out and I don't know if I even want to. I've been trying to figure this out alone and I know I can't. I just keep coming back to nothing and everything. Does that make any sense, Satsu?"

"It does surprisingly. I thought you weren't in the mood to talk?"

Buffy laughed as she shrugged her shoulders. "I told you I am confused. Lately I don't even know myself anymore. It's one of those feelings I can't figure out. I want to figure out what changed everything and you know what answer I keep coming up with?"

"What?"

"That night of the spell changed everything. This morning changed everything too. I still don't know why I came to talk to you other than Xander telling me it'd help. It didn't help. It just made me even more confused."

"Buffy, can I ask you something?" Faith asked, hoping she wasn't about to set everything back even more so. "I know how confusing this all seems, but what's stopping you from having what you want, from taking what you want?"

"I really don't know. I've never experienced these kinds of feelings before. Maybe I have, but I have been so used to pushing them away and denying them. I don't know how to just accept it."

"What are you afraid of?"

"Everything."

"You aren't alone."

"No, I really am not alone, am I?" Buffy laughed as she quickly wiped away her tears. "I can't believe how easy it is for me to just talk to you. I am still trying to figure you out, Satsu."

"There isn't that much to figure out."

"There is though," she pointed out as she backed away from the stone railing and began pacing. Faith knew when she started to pace it was a sign she was nervous and she tried not to stare too much. "You are in love with me and you don't even know me. I don't know how something like that can even be possible!"

"It is what it is, B."

"Oh god," Buffy shook her head as she stopped pacing and stared at her. "You called me B again."

"Sorry."

"Maybe I was wrong before. You and Faith are a lot more alike than I'd care to admit."

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

"Because it is! You are not her, Satsu. Despite what I am going through right now and how confused I am feeling, it isn't going to just go away because you've stepped in her place. She isn't even here. I can't even get in touch with her just to talk about how I am feeling. Even if I could I don't think she'd listen to me."

"She might surprise you," Faith muttered under her breath as she turned her back to her so she wouldn't be able to see her own tears forming.

She tensed when she felt Buffy place a hand tentatively on her shoulder. She didn't want to talk about it anymore, she hated the way it was making her feel. She just wanted everything to be easier than it was. She wanted the prophecy to somehow magically be fulfilled without her having to take it as far as she thought she had to. She turned to look at Buffy, fighting back her tears as their eyes gradually met.

"No matter what I am feeling right now for Faith, I still have these unexplained feelings for you, Satsu. I can't get them out of my head. God, I feel so pathetic right now. I think I know why I kissed you this morning and why I stood outside your door, debating whether or not to go back in there and talk to you about how I really felt."

"And how do you really feel, Buffy?"

"All I know is that I want to kiss you again. I'm afraid of what comes after that."

"I am too, a little."

"I've never..."

"Shh," Faith whispered as she slid her arms around Buffy's waist and pulled her in close. "Do you ever wonder what would happen if you stopped overanalyzing the situation and just let whatever is going to happen, happen?"

"That's what I'm most afraid of because I don't know what is going to happen."

"You think I'm not afraid either?"

"I don't know. Are you?"

"I am."

"What is happening between us?"

"I don't know, Buffy. We can't figure it out if we let it confuse us and complicate everything. I know you can't stop thinking about her, but try, just for a moment," Faith said softly, her lips barely brushing against Buffy's as she could hardly believe the words coming out of her mouth. "Lose yourself in the moment. You've done it before, haven't you?"

"I have, but it's never gotten me anywhere before."

"Buffy, stop thinking for one minute and just let whatever is going to happen, happen. Trust me, you won't regret it."

Faith knew otherwise though. She knew Buffy would regret it despite trying not to. She was beginning to understand her, little by little. Her own feelings practically mirrored her own and she swallowed the lump that was rising in her throat and kissed her lightly, barely able to stop her heart from pounding rapidly in her chest. Kissing Buffy was unlike anything she'd ever experienced before and as sweet and chaste as the kiss was, it sent her into a tailspin, her emotions fully taking over and driving her to push Buffy that one step further.

Buffy was hesitating, holding herself back as Faith kissed her again, a little harder this time. She could almost feel what Buffy was thinking in that moment; that everything was happening too fast.

Despite it happening to fast, Faith felt an invisible push edging her on. She had to keep from going too far too fast. She couldn't force Buffy to do anything she wasn't ready for, but she couldn't force herself to hold back for too much longer either. Maybe she was acting a little selfish, wanting nothing more than to get the prophecy fulfilled so she can go back to being herself. Selfish or not, she knew if it was anyone else in her position, they'd be feeling the same way she was.

"That was nice," Buffy whispered as she pulled back. "Definitely a lot nicer than I expected it to be. Again."

"Spend a lot of time thinking about what it's like to kiss another woman?"

"No," she replied, blushing as she backed away from her slowly. "I mean, sometimes, yes, but hasn't everyone at one point or another?"

"I can't speak for everyone, Buffy, but yeah, I've thought about it. Probably a little too much sometimes."

Buffy laughed as she leaned against the wall near the door and closed her eyes. "What are we doing, Satsu? Is this turning into a relationship?"

"I don't know. Is it?"

"I don't know! That's why I asked you. I've never been good at understanding these kinds of things and this," Buffy said as she motioned between the two of them, her eyes still closed. "This is confusing the hell out of me."

"Let's just take it one step at a time, Buffy. Just do whatever you feel is right. Don't question it anymore or at least try not to. It might help you feel less confused and you won't know unless you try."

"I can take it one step at a time. Just promise me one thing," Buffy said as she slowly opened up her eyes and looked at her. "Just promise me you won't try to take things a little too fast. I don't know if I could handle that. Feeling the way I've been feeling lately is new and it still scares me. I just need time to figure out what I'm feeling."

"You have all the time you need," Faith replied, fighting back the hopeless feeling that if Buffy did take her time, she'd take a hell of a lot longer than the week and a half that Faith had left to fulfill the prophecy.

The whole situation had begun to turn around, slowly but surely. She saw it in Buffy's eyes as she relaxed and smiled at her. It didn't help her from feeling conflicted still and it'd take her time to figure it all out as well.


	8. Chapter 7

Despite how conflicted they both were feeling they went out on patrol together that night. They weren't alone this time. Buffy had brought a few of the younger girls with them and sent them off in teams. It ended up just being the two of them and as much as Faith wanted to continue their talk from earlier that day, they were still within earshot of the other girls and she didn't want to make Buffy feel any more uncomfortable than she probably already felt.

"I think it's going to be a rather quiet night," Buffy said quietly as she led the way down the overgrown path. They were headed through a small patch of trees to the older part of the cemetery. "I need a night off."

"Are you okay with what happened today?" Faith asked, her voice barely above a whisper as she looked behind her to check to see where the others were. "Buffy?"

"I still don't know, Satsu. I don't think now is a good time to talk about it either."

"I get it. We won't talk about it then. I just thought..."

"You just thought what?"

"Maybe it'd help if we tried to talk about it."

"Isn't that what we've tried to do twice already today?"

Buffy stopped walking and turned to face her. She had the scythe in her hand, her knuckles turning white as she clutched it tightly. She looked like she was about to say something more and she just shook her head and continue walking down the overgrown pathway.

"I feel like I'm going about this the wrong way with the wrong person," Buffy said finally as they reached the older part of the cemetery. "I should be talking to her about this. I should be doing this with her, not you."

"I know."

"It doesn't feel right and the craziest part about it is that it does feel right. This so isn't helping me feel any less confused either."

Faith stopped her, pulling her out of the way as two vamps charged from the shadows at them. Buffy groaned out as she hit the ground and when she looked up, she instantly was on her feet and ready to take the vamps on. Faith tried to stay close to her, this new body of hers still not willing to cooperate well enough for her to be able to defend herself. They said nothing as they fell into what felt like a well-practiced and coordinated fight. For whatever reason, Buffy wasn't finishing them off as quickly as she normally would. The relentless, unrestricted fury she unleashed with her fists on the tallest, stronger vamp reminded Faith too much of herself.

Faith managed to dust the vampire that she fought, unable to keep up with it for much longer and she stood back and could only watch Buffy as she plummeted the vampire she fought to the ground, beating him until he was nearly unconscious. Every inch of her body was buzzing at the sight and no matter how many times she watched Buffy fight it turned her on to the point where she almost lost complete control over herself.

Almost the instant Buffy had finally staked the vamp under her, she was on her feet and practically stalking her way over the few feet towards her. Faith backed up until she walked into the nearest tree, her heart leaping into her throat as Buffy grabbed her and kissed her. It was wild, passionate and purely wanton and full of lust. They dropped their weapons to the ground as their hands began to explore, caress and grasp onto each other. Faith could feel the heated passion with every touch and deep yet gentle stroke of Buffy's tongue against her own.

Buffy pulled back suddenly, both their eyes searching one another's for hidden answers to unspoken questions. She saw for the first time since this whole thing began the lack of confusion and conflicted feelings in Buffy's eyes. Maybe it was the adrenaline pumping through her veins from the quick yet drawn out and easy slay, or maybe it was about her finally giving in and wanting to take exactly what she needed and what she wanted.

As quickly as those signs appeared, the disappeared and Buffy's face fell as she bent down to pick up the scythe. Faith ran her hands through her hair slowly, the texture she'd gotten used to over the past couple of days feeling different, feeling much like her own hair once felt. Full, soft and slightly curly. With wide eyes she stepped behind the tree and pulled out the compact mirror stuffed in the belt she wore. Why she had it, she wasn't sure, but she was glad she had it.

She was changing back into herself and yet as she looked at her reflection in the darkness, she could still see she hadn't changed all that much. Her hair had changed, just a little and her eyes, they were changing as well. No longer the dark brown, almost as black as they were. They were softer, lighter. They were her own. Almost.

"Satsu?"

"Yeah?" She answered in a shaky voice.

"We should find the other girls, I don't want them being cornered by any vamps tonight."

"Right behind you," she stammered as she tucked the compact mirror back into the belt. She ripped off a small piece of her shirt and pulled her hair back. She tied the black cloth, hoping she'd be able to hide the subtle changes she was going through. She was in no way prepared to explain any of it to Buffy.

It was going to be one hell of a long night and the tingling sensations on her lips would do nothing but remind her of that kiss. She wanted more. She had a taste and she wanted more, so much more.

****

Seventeen vampires and three demons later they headed back to the castle, exhausted yet the adrenaline of the night was coursing through their bodies at an alarming rate. Buffy and Faith fell behind the others, both of them unable to keep looking over at one another every couple of seconds. Faith recognized the look on Buffy's face. She was definitely feeling the after effects of slaying and she definitely wanted to deal with it soon. Her body language was practically screaming at Faith for her just to take her up against a tree at the side of the road, but she had some control over herself. She wasn't about to let that happen. At least not out there.

Once inside and once they had nearly gotten to their rooms it became a battle over who could regain control as their lips met, bodies slammed against closed doors and the cool, stone walls. Faith let Buffy lead, she was rendered helpless and under a haze of lust and love and the after-slay hornies. They crashed through the door, both of them instantly fumbling with each other's clothes, desperately trying to get rid of them.

Faith broke away from the kiss, panting as she pulled the skin-tight black sweater off of Buffy, nearly ripping it to shreds in the process. Her hands were shaking slightly as she ran the tips of her fingers over Buffy's arms and down across her smooth, taut stomach. She stopped when she reached the belt buckle and she held her breath as she felt Buffy shiver slightly.

"You sure you want to do this?"

"Don't talk," Buffy whispered as she tugged on Faith's shirt. "Please. Don't say anything. Just take me."

She could only nod her head as Buffy eased her shirt up slowly and she smiled as soon as her shirt was off and tossed to the floor. In an instant Faith was kissing her again, her hands trailing slowly up and down Buffy's back, purposely avoiding the clasp of her bra as she backed her up to the bed. Buffy moaned into her mouth as she brought her right hand around from her back and slowly began a slow descent to her bra covered breasts. With her other hand she flicked the clasp open and Buffy pulled back from the kiss, looking a little unsure for a moment as Faith slid her bra off and let it drop to the floor.

She stopped herself from saying anything, wanting to keep going and not to scare Buffy off. She ducked her head down slowly, trailing feather-light kisses over Buffy's neck as her fingers tentatively made their way to gently pinch her hardening nipples. The light kisses became harder, wetter as she moved her lips down further, missing not an inch of Buffy's succulent breasts. She was trying so hard not to rush this between them and this was definitely a first for her.

Buffy pulled her back up, her lips crushing against Faith's as she tried to unclasp her bra. After a couple of tries, she finally got it undone and she laughed quietly as Faith shrugged out of it and laid her down on the bed without breaking the kiss. The rest of their clothes came on in a hurry, Faith not being one to take it that slow. She just needed to feel her fully against her and once she could, she lost all control over the thoughts that ran through her head in that moment.

"Fuck," she stammered as she tried to get her ragged breathing under control. "You feel so good against me, B."

Faith kissed her again, their tongues duelling and dancing in a fiery, erotic dance as she slid her hand between their bodies, not hesitating as she reached the closely trimmed curls that barely covered her slick and hot pussy. She kissed her harder as her fingers slipped over her clit gently, teasing her. Buffy groaned and dug her nails into her shoulders, kissing her deeper as Faith slipped her fingers over her clit a little harder. She straddled Buffy's left thigh, grinding her sex hard against the smooth skin as she slipped her fingers lower.

She opened her eyes, her lips not leaving Buffy's and she watched her even though her eyes stayed closed. She could see a mix of pleasure, of lust and confusion pass over her face as she dipped two her fingers into her achingly hot and wet hole. Buffy's eyes flew open as she buried her fingers inside of her as deep as she could and she rolled her hips against Buffy's thigh, her wetness just seeping out as an indescribable amount of pleasure washed over her. Buffy wasn't even touching her aside from digging her nails into her shoulders and she was about ready to pop.

"Buffy...touch me," she whispered against her lips. "I need you to touch me."

She knew she shouldn't have said a word and she stilled her fingers as Buffy pulled back away from her a little. She relaxed when Buffy smiled shyly at her and untied her hair, letting it fall down and over both of them and she pulled her in for a kiss, both of her hands buried in her hair as she rose her hips into Faith's hand.

Her fingers were unsure, tentative as they deftly explored every inch of skin they could reach. She could feel Buffy nearing the edge, her orgasm beginning to peak as her body tensed and her cunt pulled her fingers in deeper, pulsing hard around them with every slow thrust she made. They only stared at each other as Buffy came hard against her fingers. Faith could feel herself reaching a small orgasm and she came with a small gasp and collapsed on top of Buffy, sighing as they wrapped their arms around each other, their legs intertwined. It had been quick and she was hoping Buffy wanted more. She was far from finished. So far from it.

They basked in the afterglow, Faith loving the feel of Buffy's fingers dancing over her back. She shivered every time she reached her neck and began the slow descent back down. She lifted her head up from Buffy's chest and smiled down at her, kissing her softly and fully intending to continue but the sudden intense pain caused her to stop and pull away from her. She rolled off the bed, clutching her stomach as she fell to the floor.

"Satsu?" Buffy cried out worriedly as she got off the bed and knelt down next to her. "What's happening? Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine," she groaned as she felt the familiar pains she'd felt the night she had been changed into what she was now. "I'm sorry I...I don't know what's happening."

"Should I get someone?"

"No, Buffy. Just give me a minute, I'll be fine."

"Are you sure? Satsu, this can't be right or normal. What's happening?"

She shook her head as she pulled herself up from the floor and stumbled to the bathroom adjoining Buffy's room. She slammed the door behind her, breathing out heavily as she fumbled with the lock. She stumbled towards the sink and gripped onto it hard, trying to steady herself. She gasped and nearly fell back when she looked up into the mirror and watched as she changed slowly back into herself, the pain so intense she felt numb.

"Oh god," she groaned as the pain finally ended and she just stared at herself in the mirror, not sure how to feel. She should be relieved. The prophecy had been fulfilled, but now she had a dilemma. How could she walk out of there as herself with Buffy waiting for her, for 'Satsu' to come out of the bathroom?

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked as she knocked on the door.

"Fine," she said softly, hoping Buffy wouldn't recognize her voice. "Be right out in a minute, Buffy."

"You sound different. Are you sure you are okay?"

"I'm fine," she rasped as she turned on the tap and splashed some water on her face. "I said I'll be right out."

She stayed in there, breathing heavily as she watched the water run down the drain. The bathroom had no windows, no other way out and she knew either way she was completely fucked the instant she walked out of the bathroom. Breathing a little harder, she shut off the water and unlocked the door knowing she couldn't stay in there forever. The room was nearly dark aside from the light that was on next to the bed and she saw Buffy lying on the bed, the covers over her and her face buried into the pillow

She could hear her crying softly as she approached the bed. She felt unsure of what to say or what to do. She wanted to climb into bed with her, hold her and make everything all right again. She sighed out softly as she picked up her clothes from the floor.

"Where are you going?" Buffy asked, not yet moving to look at her. "It was horrible for you, wasn't it? That's why you..."

"No, B."

Buffy turned around and looked at her, her eyes going wide as she saw Faith standing at the end of the bed clutching her clothes to her chest. "Faith? What the hell are you doing in here?!"

"I've been here the whole time."

"No...no you haven't. I was just with Satsu and she..."

"Buffy," Faith sighed as she sat on the bed, her back to her as she shook her head slowly. "I don't know how to explain this and I don't expect you to believe a word I'm about to say, but Satsu was me, B."

"No, that wasn't you, Faith."

"I told you that you wouldn't believe me. Why would you, right? You were thinking about me while _she_ fucked you, weren't you? That's why I changed back, isn't it?"

She couldn't stop her own tears from falling, tears that were a mix of happiness and desperation and fear. She got what she wanted, she was herself again, but she didn't want it to happen this way. The tears came harder when Buffy moved to sit behind her and reached out and gently laid a hand on her bare shoulder.

"Faith...please try to explain this to me. I have been so confused," Buffy whispered, her voice cracking as she continued crying. "What happened?"

"You remember the night you sent me out on that solo mission?" Faith asked as she turned her head to look at her for a second. "When I fell through the roof of the church I found a door to a room and went to check it out. You know, bright lights, pretty colours, tempting. I went somewhere as soon as I walked in that room. I was...god...this is harder than I thought."

"Tell me."

"The Powers that Be changed me into _her_ to help you see."

"See what?"

"Me."

"I don't understand."

"Fate, Buffy. Destiny, true love, all that crap I never believed in before. Must have come true if I'm myself again. Pretty fucked up prophecy, huh?"

Buffy sighed, laughing after a moment as she wrapped her arms around Faith from behind. "You know, I had this feeling the whole time there was something off about you, well, about her. I kept trying to convince myself I was only seeing you in her because I couldn't stop thinking about you."

"So thought you were gonna kick my ass once you found out who 'Satsu' really was," Faith laughed dryly, still clutching onto her clothes and afraid to turn around and look at Buffy. "You can, you know. I'll understand."

"I don't want to kick your ass, Faith."

"Then what do you want to do?"

"Turn around," she whispered, her lips trailing light kisses over her shoulder. "I want to continue what we started before this...sudden change happened."

"Is this what you want, B? You want me?"

"I do. I want you as you are and as you were."

"Just like that? What about..."

"I'm not feeling so confused anymore, Faith. You're right. You helped me see, really truly see what I've always wanted. It's weird because when you were her, all I could ever think about was you. All I ever wanted was to experience that with you. In a very twisted way I did though, didn't I?"

Faith turned around then, dropping her clothes to the floor as she wrapped her arms around her. For the first time in her life she felt free, unguarded and loved. It was definitely the best feeling in the world to know that the one person in the world she never thought would love her or want to be with her was right there in her arms, wanting and needing her just as much as she did.

Whatever was waiting for them beyond that night, she no longer cared, no longer was afraid. The only thing that mattered was that they'd finally found each other.

And she knew she was sure about one thing. It was going to be one hell of a long night.


	9. Epilogue

A/N: I never planned to write this story too long, it actually was longer than I originally planned out for it. Hope you enjoyed it and thank you to all those who read and reviewed (and to those who read and didn't review too)

* * *

Months passed by quickly and their relationship blossomed with every day that had passed. It wasn't perfect. She never expected it to be. Then again, she never expected to be this happy, to be in love and for her to be with Buffy.

Fate had changed her life and instead of fighting it like she normally would have, she gave in and went along willingly. The Powers that Be definitely knew what they were doing when they changed her and forced her to take the intense and quick journey to helping Buffy through what was still one of the greatest adventures of her life; discovering true love they were both destined to have together.

Just like that night everything had changed, she found herself back at the same church and this time, she wasn't alone. She and Buffy had gone there looking and hoping to find the answers they were looking for. They knew they would find them tonight as the Powers that Be had told them both in their dreams that if they wanted the answers they would have to come for them.

"Fucking doors are locked," Faith muttered as she tried the front doors. "What do you think we should do?"

"The roof?" Buffy shrugged as she looked up and then back down at Faith. "We can't exactly break in without being noticed or caught and I am so not a fan of getting caught and thrown into jail."

"I have a feeling I'm gonna have this déjà vu feeling in a minute," Faith laughed as she found the drain pipe and quickly climbed up. "You coming, B?"

"Right behind you."

Faith chuckled as she walked to the spot where she'd fallen through months before. It hadn't been fixed and a tarp was covering the hole, protecting the inside of the church from the outside elements. She lifted the tarp back as Buffy joined her on the roof. She didn't even look back at her as she jumped down and landed on the floor with a loud thud.

"Are you crazy, Faith?"

"Sure am, B. What are you waiting for?" Faith called up as she watched her peer down at her through the hole in the roof. "It isn't that far."

Buffy groaned out loudly in annoyance as she jumped down and landed next to Faith. "Happy now?"

"Not until you kiss me."

"You are never satisfied, are you?"

"Oh I am, but I just like to tease you," Faith laughed as she reached for her hand and pulled her towards the one door she hoped would bring them to where she'd gone before. "Ready, B?"

"What if..."

"What?"

"What if we don't like the answers we're about to hear? What if it changes everything?"

"It won't. It's just going to explain everything, B. Come on, what are you afraid of?"

Buffy shrugged and allowed Faith to lead them through the door. The soft light instantly surrounded them as they began to freefall. They landed softly on their feet and Faith laughed softly, happy she hadn't landed on her ass like the last time. Buffy held onto her hand tightly as the light faded away and instead of the cave she'd been in before, they were in the middle of a meadow, soft sunlight just poking its way through the puffy white clouds above.

"Wow," Buffy said quietly as she looked around her. "Is this where they brought you before?"

"No."

The wind picked up, just slightly, and a porcelain type figure stepped out from behind a grove of trees not too far from them. It smiled at both of them as it slowly approached and came to a stop just a couple feet from them.

"I take it the journey was a safe one?" It spoke, the voice so soft either of them could hear it speak. "You've come for answers, haven't you?"

"Yes," Faith nodded her head. "Answers to questions I am sure you already know."

"You want to know about why, don't you not? Do you dare question your fate?"

"Haven't we already done that?" Faith asked.

"You have."

"I want to know something," Buffy said softly as she let go of Faith's hand. "Why did she have to change for me to really see her?"

"Is it not clear as to why?"

"No."

"You were never going to see nor were you ever going to feel if it hadn't been this way. She had to be another to lead you down the path, at least the start of that path. Now," the figure smiled at them as it stepped two steps closer to them. "Aren't you two the least bit curious as to what this has all unleashed inside of you?"

"You mean there's something else aside from knowing what it's like to be in love like this?" Faith asked, surprised when the figure shook its head no. "Well..."

"You both have the gift, the calling of a Slayer. You both were born for this..."

"Yes, heard the story before," Faith muttered under her breath and winced as Buffy elbowed her in the ribs.

"You have always had the hidden power of feeling each other through a connection much stronger than what you realize is there. It's stronger now and it will only continue to grow as you two grow and love one another."

"Is that all?"

"Faith, shut up," Buffy hissed as she jabbed her with her elbow again. "Don't mind her."

"There are no more answers, at least none that I can provide for you. Everything you are truly looking for, all the answers you've ever needed, you'll find within each other. Until we meet again, I trust you two will continue to find the happiness in one another."

With that, they were surrounded by the light and when it rapidly disappeared they found themselves in the storage room.

"Well, that fucking sucked."

"Faith, it didn't suck. I've never experienced anything like that."

"Yeah well..." she groaned as she opened the door and stormed out. "Wasn't exactly expecting to walk away with no fucking answers that make any fucking sense!"

"Did you not hear what it said to us, Faith? All the answers we're looking for we can find within each other."

"You don't truly believe that, do you?"

"I never used to believe a lot of things," Buffy said quietly as Faith stopped and turned to look at her. "It got me nowhere before and I promised myself after that night we had together that I would never not believe. Anything is possible if you want it to be."

"I guess I expected more, you know?"

"With the Powers that Be, you never know what to expect."

"One thing though," Faith chuckled as she pulled Buffy close to her and kissed her lightly. "At least we left as ourselves. Got to say, I was so not looking forward to changing into someone I am not."

"You want to get out of here?" Buffy asked, looking up at the hole in the roof as their team of Slayer's appeared and dropped down a rope. "I have a feeling we'll be spending the rest of the night looking for the answers we didn't get here tonight."

"After you, B."

Faith grinned as Buffy began climbing up the rope, stopping about halfway to look back down at her. She blew Faith a kiss before climbing up the rest of the way.

Faith looked around the dark church and back to the storage room where her whole life had changed. No matter who she had been or who she was now, Buffy had loved her despite it all. She climbed up the rope, never looking back. She could only continue to look forward now and reflect back on who she was before her life had changed that one fateful night. Buffy would always love her as she was. It was their fate after all and because of the prophecy, their lives had finally merged to become one.

The future was definitely going to be interesting and it was definitely going to be one hell of an adventure and she couldn't wait to find out what lay ahead.

She was ready for anything. For everything. There was no looking back now.

The End


End file.
